Sunday blues

Trying to enjoy a Sunday with my family, before the week begins, again, I'm in a funk, mood, if you will. I try and push worry away, I have tomorrow alone to deal with that. Why waste time worrying? I am trying not to clean house, or even cook as to enjoy US today. Beer is iced down, laundry and homework being done, something to grill later. Money isn't great, but today we're just fine and have everything we need. Gas in the car, roof over our heads, food, and other wants... not just needs. So why the blue? I don't want to craft, as I can do that in alone time. I have watered my lovely plants, and don't want to clean the yard, but just relax. Why do I find that so hard? Tomorrow we go back to the grind. Today, with us 3 together, is just to enjoy. I need to kick the funk and enjoy it!! and each other. Let the stresses melt away, cares and worry for tomorrow or another day... just enjoy today ❤️ Find your happy. Make your happy. each and every single day! :)

Flowers

Friends

It has been quite awhile. Lots of things have changed. Our daughter is 'grown', 15 now and a Sophmore in high school. I am a stay at home wife and mom and living the dream.

So why to I struggle with friends? 

I have made a few great friends over the years, mostly thru work. I suppose over the years of separation, we communicate now via social media and messaging, now and again, rather than face to face. They are not in close proximity. There is that handful of great women in my life I truely miss. 

Now that I don't work, I have lots of 'friends', rather more acquaintances, thru my husband's work. I find this is tough, because of the 1 thing we have in common is my husband. I joking tell him he is the reason I have not any friends. First off, he is amazing and sets the bar high. He is truely my best friend. Secondly, he is so amazing I find friends become jealous at times of our relationship and family dynamics. 👪  I wouldn't change that for the world. Third, the older I get, the less b.s. I am willing to out up with. When drama happens, I tend to close that door, quickly. I don't have a whole lot of give (a shit) left.

So know, what do I do about this dilemma? 

I suppose I could lower my standards. I could get used to people having hidden agendas and being my friend to obtain their goals at work with my husband. I could meet people outside of his work, whom I have nothing work related in common with (boring). Where is my outlet?

Is it truely an issue to not have good female friends? Maybe it's perfectly fine for it to just be us, and I should be happy and content with just us 2. 😊  Sometimes though, especially when he's gone, I feel lonely. 

I'd like someone other than my other half (or our daughter) to confide in. Other than family, I mean. My person, non related to the fire department, no hidden agenda, no strings attached (to work), flexible schedule, etc... 

Maybe I should take out an ad. Looking for a dispatcher who works nights, gets off in the morning and wants to have a beer (sometimes coffee lol) at 8am, smokes, cusses, and doesn't have littles to attend to. (We've done our time and don't care to have 'them' around anymore).  

I feel too specific. Maybe I'm not needy, but am wanting. I feel I am low maintenance and high energy. Always happy and positive. (Watch out when I'm quiet!) Does this person exist? 🤔  I did, so I know they're out there. 😆 

Wondering and pondering is all. 

 

Now credit for those FEW friends I do have in my life, aside from Danny, there's only a handful, maybe. one, they know me, and love me just the same. They don't judge me (or we wouldn't be friends), they support me. Women should lift one another up, and encourage one another, not bash or critic each other. Common interest are also key. Plants and gardening, crafting, but mostly, family values are essential to me. A few are fire family, not many have made it. To these women, I am grateful for. 🙏 ❤️ 😊

continued at...

please see me at mendezus3-2013.blogspot.com

sorry for the inconvienence!!

Professional Christmas Pictures SURPRISE FOR DANNY!

Lily's school pictures from Oct. 2012

OH WHAT A DAY! Sunday November 4th

It is Sunday Nov 5th. I am SOOO SICK AGAIN - I think this is a sinus infection and double ear infection. My head is throbbing, pounding and I have a fever on and off hot and cold every few minutes with sweats etc... I barely made it through work yesterday didn't do anything but the bare minimal and lay around and sleep, for 12 hours. I could barely drive home. I took a bath, crawled into bed and slept for 12 hours, not waking up to my alarm (even with the time change, fall back giving me an extra hour) I over slept and was late to work, only 19 mintes amazingly!!!

Thank goodness there is no traffic on Sunday mornings. I almost got a ticket however a man was nice enough to cut me off (Yes, I said nice enough) and slow me down to avoid zooming by a state trooper at 80 plus mph in a 70. What an early Christmas present. At first I of course cursed the driver and thought now I'm going to be even later to work, but in retrospect I would have had been really late and had a ticket for speeding had he not cut me off. He did it on purpose so when I saw him adjust his mirror to look at me, I waved thank you. However when 70 dropped to 60 mph I still drove right by him thinking what are the odds there would be 2 troopers so close together and questioning whether or not I learned my lesson... heehee, obviously not. Anyway, I didn't get a ticket and I made it to work in a record 32 minutes 746 to 717 and clocked in at 719. Awesome.

Thank goodness it is a Sunday. It is the beginning of a new week, and pay period and the end of my long week, so I only work Wednesday & Thursday this upcoming week. Plus I have PTO later this month for my birthday and Thanksgiving, so I didn't want to call off sick. It is a Sunday, slow as ever, averaging 4 calls so I may as well be here and not home drugged up. Well, in order to get better I probably should be homein bed but I can do that the next two days. Good plan. I haven't eaten anything. Good diet. I didn't even have any caffeine yesterday, if that tells you how sick I really am. I just sipped room temperature water all day. I did make a cup of coffee this morning, haven't had any yet and drank a DIET PEPSI (because it was all I had cold rushing out the door) on my way into work. Those of you who know me, now that I don't ldrink DIET PEPSI EVER!!!! So I must be really sick to drink it, not be able to taste it.

Anyway... I am here at work and feeling better than yesterday, at least. If I don't feel on the mend tomorrow I'll go back to the doctor. Danny will be home, to take care of Lily so I can take of me. That's good.